We have all looked back at ourselves in photo and video and done a silent wish that we could be that person again. Thin, nice skin, sleek hair, flat tummy, no sagging…
No baldness no chin hair no gray. Sometimes wouldn’t it be nice to just stop the clock for just a little while. But as I keep saying to those around me the alternative to aging is not an alternative. You either age or you don’t. I’m not ready for the alternative. I will continue to age as long as I possibly can as well as I possibly can.
But as I started out saying we have all wished to have a little bit of our idea of our perfect back.
I celebrate the person that I was in my 20s 30s 40s. She was a pretty awesome girl. Now she’s a pretty awesome awesome girl. But looking back at photographs from any of those decades I can find pictures where I think to myself “wow did I ever look great.” I loved my hair, I loved my tummy, my legs look good my butt look good, I didn’t have any gray hair and no wrinkles. But I also celebrate this decade being in my 50s. I look good for 55. And it’s not because I try and work at it. I really kind of don’t. I exercise but not as much as I should or as hard as I should. I don’t always wash my make up off and put on the night cream. I sometimes let my gray grow in a little too long. And certainly as of today there will be no bikini in my near future. But we’ll get back to that.
I think every decade of our life we have great beauty and we need to celebrate all of that beauty. All of the experience. All of the hard work. And marvel that we can do so much to feel good about ourselves. We have it all in our control. From what we eat to what we do for exercise to how much rest we get. It’s all up to us.
One thing I don’t do is compare myself to other people at all. I really don’t. Because everybody has a different body from me different hair different life. I do however compare myself to myself. And I ask myself am I doing my best at this time. Or could I work harder. And if the answer is work harder then I probably should do that. Sometimes I listen.
I would love to be 44 again today. Because I was looking at pictures from the year I was 44 and my boys were just little and we took them to Puerto Vallarta for a vacation. That was only 11 years ago. I looked really really good. That was in my mid-40s.!
When I was in my 20s I didn’t even really think about it honestly. I just was who I was. I think the thing I thought about the most at that time was my hair. Because I had really good long hair and I liked it a lot and did a lot with.
When I was 37 I feel like I was at the height of my physical best.
What I would really like to do now that I’m 55 and approaching my 35th wedding anniversary is look my best for my age now. I am not going to compete with all of those other decades. That would be foolish. Because not only is my body very different having gone through menopause. I also have wrinkles. And my neck is not a young neck anymore and neither are my hands.
How can I compete with a 37 and a 44-year-old me.? I can’t do it. I will never look like that person again. And that’s OK. I also had a look at a few photographs of myself over the last year. And while I may not be as thin as I would like for this time of year. I still like who I am at 55. I’m really happy that I’ve reached the stage of my life where I’m just happy with who I am. That doesn’t mean I will never work at a better version of me. In fact I already have started a little bit and I’m going to ramp up at the activity and the cleaner eating in the next few days. Because I have something to work towards. Summers coming I kind of want to wear a bikini. But a bikini suitable for 55-year-old mom. And my 35th wedding anniversary, I want to have great pictures and be happy with how I look. But that’s the future me. The one I have control over.
If you’ve read this far then you may have gotten my message? I’m not even sure if I’m being clear. At 55 you do tend to get a fuzzy head. And a glass of wine on a Friday night doesn’t hurt.
My point is you can be the best you of the age you are now and you can be really happy doing it.
So readers today and tomorrow and the next day – take a few minutes to celebrate who you are now. Remember who you were and be happy that you had that experience. Don’t beat yourself up if you’re not that person anymore because you’re not. You’re a new version of you and you have control. But choose the best you that you are now. Don’t worry about before. That person had her chance. Now it’s up to you. Celebrate. Enjoy.
Note to self – Take some pictures because you’re 65-year-old self will want to see how good you looked 10 years ago.
Focused Friends 
This is a thought provoking and inspiring read. Funnily enough, when I was younger, I really hated my appearance and yet now I would be happy to have the appearance of younger me. Fortunately, I have reached a point in life, at age 49, where I really do not care so much about it. I realised that I don’t have to look at me, it’s everyone else that gets lumbered with that and so if I look bad, well, it’s a shame for others lol. I had stunning parents and that could have felt a lot to live up to, but actually both of my parents suffered from the bad and shallow behaviour of others, who wanted to use them for their looks. I know how that pained them both. So, I always felt kind of lucky to be big nosed, wonky eyed, overweight and not very attractive. Bizarre, really, how we form our thoughts. Thanks for making me think on this. It’s interesting.
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