Hello, it’s been a while since I got to write anything here in Focused Friends. It’s been a long summer with lots of good events and happy occasions, however, it’s also been a time filled with a lot of stressful family matters that I’ve been dealing with. In fact, I now realise that I wasn’t just dealing with them; I was consumed by the responsibilities and the emotion that I was swept up in. And so, for me, time has passed this year much in the way that it did last year immediately following the loss of my mum and other family members, and during the Lockdown(s). Time has stretched and warped, it’s bent and merged, blurring at times and yet bringing a painful sharpness at others. Bottom line is that I feel that I’ve lost the familiar sense of it altogether.
I feel like I was just entering Spring time yesterday, and today I have awoken to Autumn.
A few days ago I awoke and took my usual morning routine of venturing downstairs in search of my first coffee of the day. Warm drink in hand, I went to my sunroom and sat in my favourite ‘morning chair’. (A wide, soft recliner with lots of cushions and a fur throw across just waiting to be wrapped around me) I sat down and gazed out of the window and into my garden. A very normal thing to do, but little did I know that today was going to be different. This time I actually saw what was there. For so long, I now realise, I’ve been looking but not seeing. I’ve been staring beyond my immediate environment; seeking either meaningful answers or an emotional escape from deep and troubled thoughts. Today was different; today I was able to see again.
As I sat, I wrote these musings;
It’s a beautiful Autumn day today and the sun is shining in a clear blue sky, which I enjoy from the comfort of my sun room. It’s early morning and the house is quiet with everyone still sleeping. I like this time of day where I have some moments to sit and reflect on meaningful events and conversations, or to simply take the time to notice the changes in the garden.
Recent weeks and months have been fairly busy, and at times stressful, as I went through the process of selling my late mum’s house and so I haven’t stopped often enough to just take notice and appreciate the simple beauty of nature and the change in our seasons. But today, I can afford time. This time to just feel the sun as it casts it’s early morning glow through the half closed blinds. I notice how it catches on the many cobwebs spanning across our garden furniture. These seem to appear on a daily basis this time of year and I choose not to think about their creators! The webs themselves look pretty and I do love to see them in each of the different weather conditions that we get. How they glisten in the frost, how they catch the sunlight as today, or when they bend and stretch as the wind catches them. Fascinating structures which are not only pretty in design, but are also of an intricate and purposeful architecture.
These thoughts are taken from an article I wrote (Project 365 – Day 263) for my personal blog ‘Dreams and Aspirations’ (A daily blog which I developed this year to give me a focus in order to make positive changes to my daily lifestyle throughout this year. )
I wanted to share these thoughts here with readers in FF because they signify to me a very important transition, not only of the change in season, but the beginnings of a personal awakening and true reconnection to the world around me once again.
I do hope to write more here very soon, perhaps I will add to my experience of Autumn. If you have a favorite part of Autumn you’d like to share with us, please do so in the comments, I’d love to hear them.